From: Tarutino, Bessarabia
28 August 1912

I often visit Krasna from here to see my father, Romuald Dirk. There I often have the opportunity to study the Staats-Anzeiger and the many letters. One would love to have a new copy every day!

I noticed a letter from my sister Eugenia Richter of Morton County, North Dakota. I am happy to see that my sister is also an avid reader of the paper.

I would like to ask her to write more often as well, as she seems to have more time than I. I was also happy to hear from sister Annamaria Gross. I may get lucky and immigrate to America as well. I do not have the resources to get across the Big Drink; otherwise, I would be there already. I hear you folks in North Dakota had a record harvest. Send me a ticket or let me borrow the money for a ticket and pay it back on arrival.

Whenever I get to Krasna, I look for a copy of the Staats-Anzeiger and the correspondence therein.

A great coincidence was that all my brothers were here on 26 August, and all talked about America and all the friends and relatives there.

Greetings to all readers, especially Peter Januscheitis and wife, half-brother Lorenz Dirk and Cousin Jakob Dirk!

Antonia Dirk

From: Krasna, Bessarabia
30 August 1912

(Continuation and Conclusion)

Toward the end, dear mother, I have yet to tell you, the one who rears your children, that the child should not play continuously, just the same as it should not always be idle. There are many 15-minute periods at disposal, which the child itself will challenge the mother to utilize. For instance, the child wants to look at pictures, and have them explained. Without anything else, stories will attach themselves, followed by instructions and later on by the real learning when the child comes from such rearing to the care of a teacher, a real schoolmaster.

Whatsoever, telling the child little stories is one of the most important means of upbringing. Responding to this, some mothers may ask, but what should always be narrated? Many mothers do not tire out with inventing fitting stories. Where this is not the case, good advice is far in between and hard to come by, because opinions on the subject are very different. One type of story ties in with the pictures, which are shown the child. Every child likes to hear stories about animals and considers it quite natural that these are able to think and talk. The child’s fantasy personifies and brings everything to life, and it will not ask if such stories are true. However, as soon as the child begins to respond to everything with, “Is that true?” Then made-up stories may no longer be told. Unless the child is very gifted, in which case one should respond with the question, “You seem to realize that it could be true.”

Fables about animals are always appropriate, but fairytales in this respect I have to doubt. The main reason for that is, once a child has conceived in its’ mind the fairytale world, then it will find the real world uninteresting.

As it may be known, the same thing happens to adults who read too many novels.

I consider it disadvantageous to narrate too many fairytales to children and allow young people to read too many novels. Of course cruel and frightening subjects should not be allowed to appear in fables nor in fairytales. It is common that a Christian mother knows a lot of parables and similes she can narrate from the holy bible. It is also obvious that the stories should be as simple as possible and at the same time so lively as to appear real. One should not be too scholastic and insist that children use the exact same words when they retell a story. Just like an old doll may be more appealing to the child than a new one, so it often prefers to hear an old story as a new one.

One should not become impatient, but retell the same story as often as the child asks for it, and try to use the same words as much as possible. It brings the biggest joy to the child, to hear the same word for the same thing that it anticipated and got used to. It should, however, not be too long and repetitious. Nor should several stories be told at one time, because they would stimulate the child’s fantasy too much, its nerves would be weakened, and maybe the child would be spoiled.

The purpose of the storytelling is firstly, not only to pass the time, but secondly, to further the mental development of the child, the ability to think, the ability to create mental images, and the ability to express itself, and thirdly, to develop convictions. If a mother lacks the ability to tell such stories, then she should not hold back and spend a little money and confidently turn to a bookstore to purchase a booklet for a nursery. I have to be brief, because if I would write in great detail, I would take up too much space in the newspaper to a disadvantage of other correspondents.

Also, appearance and behavior of the child cannot be neglected. One should pay a lot of attention to the little ones’ posture and movement of the body. From the third year on, one should already see to it that the child: 1. Puts everything down quietly, 2.Walks silently, 3. Walks up and down the stairway in a quiet manner, 4. Closes or opens the door quietly, 5. Doesn’t motion too much with the arms while talking or walking, 6. Doesn’t sway while walking, 7. Doesn’t have too much eye movement while talking, 8. Doesn’t grimace while talking, nor play with the fingers, and stands or sits erect and quietly, 9. Doesn’t get into the habit while standing to stand on one leg, etc. Don’t think that all that can be taught the child at once or in a short time, much less that it will get used to all that in a few years. It is suffice for the time being that the child is reminded again and again at the proper time. It is satisfactory if some get used to it at age 3 to 4, others at age 5 to 6, and others again later on. At the very least should one constantly preach to the child about the matter. Yes, one should not let it be known that one places a special emphasis on it. Else, one will raise a “china doll” instead an image of a child with free movements. As with everything, so also here, it depends on what kind of intellect is administered.

One thing is for sure, a child that is simply guided, later on in school and throughout its life, will have a better posture and be more elegant in its behavior than other children who were told less or nothing at all about the subject matter. The teacher, if he is a master and an expert in educating children, will know right away the first day if the child has been properly reared. Many mothers may find my advice unimportant and may think that they would be heavily occupied to pay attention to all these things and maybe therefore remain with the old routine. Likewise, there are many fathers who think the same way and may express themselves during public meetings as follows, “For what do we need regular schooling? Why do we need such highly paid teachers and nice big school buildings? We were taught in small buildings with cheaper teachers, why shouldn’t our children do likewise.” Only men, who do not know what goes on in the world and who lack an education and proper upbringing will talk like that.

Additionally, based on my experiences as a teacher, it would also be important for the children and the classroom to observe the following rule: 1. Above all, insist on truth with children, 2. Do not tolerate incompleteness but insist on thoroughness, 3. One should not forbid the children anything that one is not willing to take seriously oneself, 4. One also should not threaten with things one cannot really accomplish, 5. Do not praise the children in their presence, because that will make them either vain or ashamed, 6. Never voice disagreements on opinions in the presence of your children about their punishment, for this will undermine authority and make punishments useless. Then they will have the appearance of arbitrariness or a personality, 7. Avoid everything that is forceful in the upbringing of children.

About these important points a great deal could be written endlessly. But I want to bring this lecture to an end with a repeated emphasis on the earlier mentioned Jeremiah Gotthelf, the author on culture, and what he has to say about unjust punishment of children. There it says that no sentiment is more alive in children than the perception for justness. Nothing makes them more stubborn, wicked, and more incorrigible than repetitious and unjust punishment. If then later on they are punished in a justified manner for a wrongdoing, it will be useless. They will not change because their belief that punishment is appropriate is lost. Very seldom does an adult know what goes on in a child’s mind, heart and spirit. Adults also hardly ever think about the cause of the children’s mistakes. They just attribute these to wickedness right away. Rarely does an adult administer punishment out of caring to improve the child, but rather to practice revenge in a rage of frustration.

Now, my dear readers, in closing I shout to you one more time, do not consider these little tips from me as useless. Make an effort to give your child a flourishing upbringing. At age seven entrust the child to the care of a competent teacher. You will find out that your efforts were not useless and will bring you blessings a hundredfold.

Romuald Dirk